Blur

Meaning: something vaguely or indistinctly perceived

Yesterday, while I was trying to sleep (which happens a lot these days, without any clear reason) – I was contemplating, or doing something of that sort. As I was thinking, it became very clear to me that this life (right now) is not very clear to me. I don’t know what I’m doing for the most part of my life – although, I know that I’m tending to sleep more during the day, find random tasks from my internship to do, learn data structures, read my current book – and yet, I don’t know what I’m doing with my life.

This is because of my past. It haunts me every night. All the mistakes I have done so far and how regretting them is an on-going part of my life. Good to know that it’s normal for humans to commit mistakes, otherwise, I don’t know how we’d survive at all. The solutions to these regrets, however, are a blurry set of images that never seem to reveal what they truly mean.

Say, for example, if meditation is one of the solutions. I know that meditation will bring me a happier life. But, what if I don’t know what to expect from a happier life? Maybe I am just overthinking right now, but don’t you ever feel like an imperfect piece in this puzzle called life? Tell me, do you?

I end these thoughts with a blurry dream – which brings me sleep. And, all I care about – as you could guess – is a good night’s sleep.

Absorb

Today, I have taken inspiration from one of the writers I know. He’s a professor at the university I study at. It is still taking some time to adjust to being a worker and a student at the same time, now that I’m an intern – I know that my college life will be missed, but not really. If you were to ask me “Would you swap your college with work?” I’d take some time and say “I don’t know” because I couldn’t care less. I love working and I love learning.

So, what’s the inspiration?

To take up the A-Z challenge. Yes, taking a letter and a word on it – to write. And, for the first day and the first letter ‘A’, I have chosen the word ‘absorb’. Why? It was better than the other words generated on this website (internet really does have a lot of tools) for worse or better.

Let’s begin, and see where this challenge takes us.


Absorb

absorb/əbˈzɔːb,əbˈsɔːb/ verb: take in or soak up (energy or a liquid or other substance) by chemical or physical action.”buildings can be designed to absorb and retain heat”

This world is a funny place that puts up a show of horror now and then. And, it’s a show indeed that we all have to take in. I found this observation closely due to the practice of meditation I’ve been following. All you do is sit there and take in all (or nothing) without attaching any kind of judgement to it. There really is no need to judge yourself for taking that extra piece of pizza while you’re on diet. You wanted it, and you had it. That’s it. You’ll know what to do next time. And, if you don’t – well – keep trying, right?

So, what do you absorb from this world?

That’s a question so hard to ask and even answer that I’ll try giving it a shot. Here’s what comes to my mind when I think about what I absorb from this world. There’s just too much around me to cope up with. So, I end absorbing nearly nothing useful or even close to being some sort of potion. And, here’s why it’s a tough one. Given the age of internet, the age of information – there is literally countless quantity of knowledge to fathom and let alone absorb.

What if even today the only source of knowledge were books? That’d be a cool thing perhaps if you like to complaint about what the future beholds. It’d be easier to only take in what we can handle. We’d only read what we like unlike now where everything is just shoved right up to your face on the internet. Like this blog.

So, here’s what I absorb – nothing. And by nothing, I mean nothing. I’ll let the stars and my flow decide what to absorb and let go. It’s not me who absorbs the information. And, it’s not you who get’s to decide.

PS: I do like to absorb my learnings, and keep them to myself. Everyone does that, right?

Jiggle Wiggle

Can words be funny in the way they sound? What is the language that’ll connect this world? How far is the pandemic’s end? Oh, that was off-topic. Right? No one can tell for sure, and you’re a good human if you considered doubt to be your friend here.

I think they can. Yes. Words can sound funny. Here’s how I believe someone can ruin the humour though:

  • Scalp gulp
  • Red bed
  • Fruit puke
  • Yellow mellow
  • Cool stool
  • Poop scoop
  • Covid, slow it
  • Mower, pull over

Don’t tell me you did. I think I can live now.

Hit me with your terrible ground-breaking ideas.

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